Recognizing a Gold Digger

I'm not saying men are stupid, because a lot of my friends are men. But I will say that a lot of guys are blindfolded when it comes to a nice booty and a hot pair of jugs. I have no problem being dirty and speaking raunchy like that, this is probably why I have a lot of guy friends. But as a woman, I also have to have my fair share of girlfriends. But for me, it sometimes seems difficult to keep girlfriends, as they tend to lie, manipulate and steal. Where men, I can just get down with them, farting, burping, and spitting if I need to spit without hearing the girly screeches of 'eeewwwww'.
I don't like girls. I am a girl, but go figure, I can't stand the rest of them.
I have only 2 real girl friends, and the rest came and went like a season. They sort of latched on to me because they thought farting was funny, or found that they could tell me anything. Even when I didn't want to hear anything. For quite some time I even thought that this girls would warm up to me because they were lesbians. Maybe I gave off a lesbian vibe? Whatever it is though, they seem to latch on, annoy me with their issues, and before I know it I have a pain in the rear sidekick I just want to get rid of.
One of my latest latch on friends is gold digging Lilly. I can't stand her, yet I keep her around just to hear her stories, or to see what she got him to buy her today. You see Lilly is hot, blond, has big fake boobs, a small butt, and tiny waist. She basically is a trophy girlfriend, a wholesome look that mom and dad will love, and a flirty flair that guys adore. Hell, I could see how men easily fell for her, but I knew deep down she never fell for them.
Her latest victim was Charlie. I knew she didn't like him, he was a guy totally different from the typical Lilly guys. He for one was fat, going bald, almost 10 years older than her, and his personality was blah. But like the typical male pig he was, he only saw a bang. I guess it serves him right. Lilly pretty much took him for everything he had, and left him to rot.
I have been friends with her for a few years and I watched her gold digging ways turn in stages. You see gold digging comes slowly, and once it starts to work without consequences, it becomes a disease. I watched Lilly go from silver digging, to gold digging, and quickly after that came platinum digging.
Digging, for any digger comes in these stages, so I figured I would share the first signs of gold digging.
1. As a guy you most likely would buy dinner. Correct? But my female question to you is, why? Whenever I go out with a guy, I make sure I pay my own. At least at first. No way in hell do I want him thinking he can buy me dinner, then take me to bed.
Before you know it, if you buy her dinner once, you will be paying all of the time. May as well throw a movie into the mix as well.
Silver stages include the little things, they may not be expensive as of yet, so you may not mind paying. Other silver stages include the following.
1. Buying her carnival tickets
2. Buying her theme park tickets
3. Buying her cheap jewelry from Claire's or Wal*mart
4. Buying her food
5. Buying her shoes, or cheap end clothing.
Silver digging gets boring though, and as soon as she has a pretty good idea of just how much you get paid she will dip into gold digging, and as she is gold digging she will mix it up with silver stages so it seems innocent.
Gold digging consists of you buying her dinner, and a group of her friends as well. Gold digging consists of
1. Buying her higher end brand name clothing
2. Buying her actual gold jewelry
3. Giving her actual money
4. Paying for her car insurance
5. Paying for things such as nail salon visits, tanning salon sessions, and beauty spas.
Once she gets a taste of the gold, she will then quickly move on to platinum digging. Who would of thought there was anything left to dig.
Platinum digging can be recognized easily, and even people around you will be asking you why you continue to pay. Here are some signs that say you are in way too deep, and it is time to kick her ass to the curb if you already haven't.
1. She has moved in.
2. You are paying her bills
3. You buy her a car because her old one 'isn't running too good anymore'.
4. You share a credit card with her
5. She has a weekly allowance
6. She manages to get you to buy her platinum jewelry, diamonds etc...
7. She takes up an expensive hobby at your expense.
8. She decorates your home according to her standards
9. She demands things now, where before she would ask, or at least give you a blow.
There are tons of signs when it comes to gold digging, but in my opinion the most important key to recognizing it is in the beginning, when you are not exclusive. If the woman offers to pay for her own meal, she's a sure keeper. A gold digger will not even offer, and may take off to the bathroom when the bill comes.
It is so cliche that a man should pay for dinner on a first date. A good honest woman knows this, don't be fooled by fake hair, fake nails, and fake smiles. Recognize it from the get go, and save yourself thousands and thousands of dollars, as well as headaches.
Ladies, also recognize male gold diggers, females are not the only ones who dig for gold these days.