God someone gag me. Like last season I once again sat through a one hour season finale of Americas Next Top Model, only to see that my favorite pick was sent packing.
Before breaking it down on how aggravated I have become with Americas
Next Top Model, let me break this pieces up in a recap for those of you
whom my of missed it.
So there are 3 girls left in the house, Aminat, Allison, and Teyona.
The season finale starts up with the girls being rushed off for a
commercial and photo shoot for CoverGirl.
The girls all go in for hair and makeup, and Aminat is up for her
commercial shoot first. She does actually really well with remembering
her lines, speaking naturally and looking fantastic! I was shocked but
Jay went on to remind viewers of how she does not really work her face,
how it seems stiff.
For me it seemed natural though and I failed to miss the whole stiff
face Jay spoke of. But hey, he's the professional right? I guess he can
spot a stiff face! At any rate, she did really well.
After he commercial we watch as she is rushed in for a quick CoverGirl
photo shoot. You don't really get to see much of what goes down on the
shoot, but Aminat seems to be doing alright.
Next we have Allison who looks a bit pudgy due to her hair being
pushed out of her face and tied into some old fashioned weave up look.
Frankly I hated it, and thought it would cost her the competition.
Although she looked really awkward she pulled off a semi decent
After the commercial Allison is rushed into some back room where her
photo shoot takes place. Once again, you don't really get to see how
well she is doing in there, you sort of get like a peek glimpse through a
back door or something.
Next up is Teyona who totally messes up the entire commercial. Now in
older seasons of Americas Next Top Model, if a competitor screwed up the
final commercial it would send her packing...all the way back home. Do
not pass go, do not collect $200 (In this case a $100,000 contract!).
Seeing that TTeyona did so piss poorly on the commercial, I
automatically had her written off in my mind. No way would the judges
let a bumbling crying mess through to the final cat walk!
Oh but they did, and they did it nicely too. They took her whole spiel
on how she was nervous, and get this, 'felt sorry for her'.
Wow, I can recall Tyra telling so many past models to suck it up.
Teyona though gets a free pass. By this point I'm frowning, because I no
longer even need to watch. I know the judges are gunning for Teyona to
hold the crown of Americas Next Top Model, before they even gave it to
Allison however is called up fist to continue on in the competition.
The bottom 2 are Teyona and Aminat. Freakishly Teyona takes the cake
over Aminat, who the judges said had a weaker photo and seemed to have
injected Novocaine into her face. How lovely!
So our final two are Allison and Teyona. I sort of knew Allison would
not win because throughout the competition she had the weakest walk, and
with the one of the final challenges the girls must work it down a
Before jumping ahead into the runway though the girls must go in to do
a final cover photo for CoverGirl. The winner of course will be
featured as a front cover on Seventeen magazine.
Us viewers were only given a quick sneak peek at the girls doing the
shoot, so it was anyones guess on who did better than who.
Shortly after this shoot the girls are gathered in a back room where
they meet quickly with Tyra who gives them some encouragement before the
McKey who is last seasons winner is also in the runway. She sloppily
clogs along the runway floor, Teyona did a better job than McKey did,
but hey McKey already won last season, so it is okay to get a little
slumped and lazy looking right?
Allison shocked me with her walk. She came out looking like a model, had a newly improved walk
The girl look smoking hot and fierce.
Plus during the second part of the runway walk she even had a little fun with it during the Samba dancing part of with Miss J.
When watched Teyona come out during part 2 of the runway show I
thought Allison surely had it in the bag. Teyona looked like a stiff
scary looking robot with straight arms that seemed to be pegged into the
sockets with tightly bolted screws.
Ah but Tyra was very impressed with Teyona during the very last runway walk... or I should say floor shake?
They had a bunch of the models; Allison and Teyona included, slither
along a slippery muddy floor. It was supposed to represent some type of
art, but frankly I could not for the life of me figure out what it had
to do with being a model, or even being in fashion?
At any rate, like I said, Teyona impresses Tyra, and why? Oh because
her giant weave came flying off of her head, and Teyona flipped it
around in the air. Tyra said it gave her chills!
Um yeah, it gave me chills too because I was wondering when she was
going to bite the head off of a chicken an start chanting some voodoo
spell. To me it looked a mess, and it almost seemed like a 'look at me,
look at me, I'm in a trance, hey look at me'. Fuh-reaky!!!
I did not think she would win at that point though, so I was not even
really focusing on her. I was TRYING to see ho Allison was doing, but
the camera at the moment seemed to be all focused on Teyona. Somewhere
in the mix was Allison who got very little camera time during the final
Next the girls are cleaned up and brought to their final panel. Both
girls look smoking hot, and the judges give them their final reviews.
First the runway. Everyone is impressed with Allison, and how much she
had improved since day 1.
Plus everyone seems to favor Allison's photos
over Teyonas. At this point I figured Allison had it in the bag. No way
in heck was robot girl and weave flipper going to take the win.
But alas my friends, Allison does not win. Teyona is crowned Americas
Next Top Model. Now I won't say I'm not happy for her, I truly am. I do
however think the judges made a mistake. I failed to see this potential
The thing that bothered me most was because the judges said that
Teyona wants it more, so they gave it to her!? Bah! I must say, this
season has probably been the only cycle I really did not like at all.
Week after week they sent home some of the top competitors. Foe for
instance could have had this in the bag...yet they ailed to see it, they
were so focused on thinking she belonged on TV more than she did in
They sent home Celia last week because for some reason all of a sudden
she was 'too old'. Weird! She was not too old in the beginning of the
competition, did she age 10 years suddenly?
At any rate folks, the winner is Teyona.
I just hope Tim Burton hires this unique creature known as Allison,
for some sort of dark Alice in Wonderland flick...she totally has the
look down and an unforgettable face!